More advertising ideas that frighten me

Those weirdo Charmin bears. Who dances that much about toilet paper? Why are they so happy? Where does the toilet paper go since they can't flush a tree? Why aren't the other woodland creatures getting together to put a stop to this?

Sprite "Sub-lym-onal" ads. Um...what the hell?

The ad for the DVD of "Scary Movie 4". I can't handle 90 seconds of two morons spitting soda on each other.

The PSAs about HPV and cervical cancer. (a) I'm a scientist. Lots of types of cancer are caused by viruses. Stop being so shocked. (b) That girl is way to happy about her mom discussing her cervix with the doctor at her back to school check up.

Fruit Roll Ups Commercials. Those kids in the factory weird me out.

Trix. Just give the damn rabbit some cereal. Or, why not buy his own cereal? Same goes for the kids always trying to steal Lucky Charms. Just find a grocery store.

Cell phone commercials featuring whiny teenagers. Those of us of a certain generation distinctly recall that it was the biggest deal in the world to get an extension in your bedroom. Stop whining about not having enough minutes or text messages or the coolest phone. We should make them all go back to one rotary dial phone in the living room until you're old enough to pay your own bills.