And know I know why I will never be in style

In the past few years, I will admit that I have been becoming more girly. I carry a purse (something I resisted for years). I dress for work. I wear make up. I splurge on the occasional manicure and pedicure. Heck, I finally have nails to get manicured. But I've resisted all interest in fashion beyond the practical, "I don't want to look completely out of touch when I show up for work."

However, every so often, my mother and/or sisters will hand me an issue of In Style magazine that they are through with. And even less often I will find myself bored enough to actually read it.

Tonight was one of those times. I am happy to report that it served to remind me why it is completely not worth the effort for me to even try to be in style (beyond the fact that I see nothing wrong with wearing white whenever you damn well please).

I am completely uninspired by helpful advice like the following, found in an article entitled "365 Star Style Secrets: Boost your style quotient this year with some celebrity know-how."

* "Nothing is sexier than the red sole of a Christian Louboutin heel." - Lindsay Lohan

* "To make lips look naturally pink, I put on -- then wipe off -- red lipstick and then apply clear gloss." - Halle Berry

* "If I don't wear a bra with a dress, I wear pasties so my breasts aren't like, 'Hello!'" - Gisele Bundchen

* "Bring your hot husband along and you can do no wrong." - Becki Newton

* Try individual false lashes. For a big event all you need to wear are fake lashes to look glamorous." - Daisy Fuentes

Phew! I am so glad to have all of this expert advice at my fingertips.